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“Now you have to interest the A&R men in your CD. It's all about image so if you're dull and ugly - name three ugly pop stars, apart from Madonna and Mick Hucknall - you may have to get one of your beautiful friends to pose for the publicity photos. ”

Live grenade removal video Write a one-page biog - they don't want to know that you have a GCSE in music, they want to know what gigs you've done and any Big Name bands you’ve supported. Drop a few names such as Bruce, Robbie and Tina. You don't have to mention surnames... If you do catch the ear of an A&R person, be prepared to throw your ego out the window - you can't afford one at the moment and when you're rich and famous you can buy a much better one anyway.

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